• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content

James M. Redwine

  • Books
  • Columns
  • 1878 Lynchings/Pogrom
  • Events
  • About

Site Admin

GOOD NEWS/BAD NEWS

August 4, 2022 by Site Admin Leave a Comment

“Mr. Redwine, this is the medical laboratory at the Palace of Pain. We have the results of your recent CT Scan. Would you like the good news or the bad news first?”

“Oh, let’s go with the bad news; lay it on me.” 

“Okay Jim, the bad news is there isn’t much good news. However, you show no signs of any fatal health condition. On the other hand, you probably should stay away from any sharp instruments or loaded pistols until after we can remove the large kidney stone that showed up on your CT Scan.”

“What about just ignoring the stone; will it simply dissolve or pass on its own?”

 “I’m afraid not. What is most likely is the large calcified mass will dislodge on its own and seek to escape out of your kidneys. Of course, as a member of the male part of the species, you know the route the large stone must take to get free. Yes, that’s right, that is how it must escape if we just leave things up to Mother Nature. Or we can go in there and break it up and wait as the pieces work their way along the aqueduct system until they achieve the end of the waterway. What’s your pleasure (if you don’t mind the expression?)”

“Ugh, can’t you just shoot me? After all I’m almost 80 years old and it’s already been a pretty good run?”

“Actually, we’d be willing to shoot you but they won’t let us. We’ll have to dig out the kidney stone. It’s an easier procedure than Peg’s second hip replacement that’s scheduled in two weeks. She isn’t whining; it looks like she’s the one with the manly equipment. When do you want to get this rodeo started? It could break free at any time and, if it does, you know where it will get stopped up. You do not want that! We’ll give you a silver bullet to bite on. How about next week?”

“Can you give me a few more details?” 

“Sure, we’ll go in with a tube and break the stone up, leave a stent in to keep the passageway open then spend about the next week watching the pieces work their way out.” 

“Work their way out of where?” 

“Out of your kidneys, of course.” 

“How do they get out of my urine?”

“You already know where the urine comes out.” 

“Yeh, I know that but how do you get up there to get the pieces?” 

“We have to insert a long rubber tube up there, you know, there.” 

“How do you do that?” 

“We insert it in the end of the device Mother Nature gave you and let things progress, more or less, naturally.” 

“Okay, back to Plan B; let’s use that silver bullet for its truly intended purpose.”

“Nope, I lied we won’t shoot you. Not for your sake, but because we are all younger, we don’t have kidney stones and we’re not going to jail just because you’re a wimp. Buck up! Plenty of men, and a lot of women too, have survived kidney stones. As for me, I am ready to do this now. I’m not afraid.” 

“I’m impressed with your courage.”

Well, here we are. Two female nurses, Peg, one Marquis de Sade trying to pass for a Galen and me naked and exposed. “Isn’t that tube rather large and awfully long? What about a general anesthetic. And you better keep that sharp scalpel out of my reach.”

Well. Gentle Reader, it’s now two days after Peg’s surgery, one week after my two surgeries (yes, I had to have two), and I got the last laugh! Just as Peg got finished typing this article a mouse ran over her feet and she is now the biggest wimp at JPeg Osage Ranch! At least for one brief shining moment.

For more Gavel Gamut articles go to www.jamesmredwine.com

Or “Like/Follow” us on Facebook & Twitter at JPegOsageRanch

Share this:

  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
  • Share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window) WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Gavel Gamut

Our Two Branch Democracy

July 22, 2022 by Site Admin Leave a Comment

Photo by Peg Redwine

Pure democratic government involves direct selection of leaders by those who are led. The United States is two thirds of a democracy. The Executive Branch is elected by popular vote every four years. The House of Representatives of the Legislative Branch is elected by popular vote every two years. The Senatorial part of the Legislative Branch is elected by popular vote in staggered parts over six years. The Executive and Legislative Branches then select all members of the federal judiciary. The American public has no direct input in the selection of the Judicial Branch.

Federal judges receive life-time appointments subject only to their own choice or, extremely rarely, impeachment. Supreme Court Justice Samuel Chase (in 1805) was the only U.S. Supreme Court justice to have articles of impeachment brought against him; he was acquitted and continued on the court. Fifteen lower federal court judges have been impeached in American history. Eight were convicted and removed from the court. Four were acquitted and three resigned. We currently have about 1,800 federal judges including 9 Supreme Court justices.

The Judicial Branch of our government is in some ways the most powerful and in every way the least democratic branch. While we have only one President, the President may serve a maximum of eight years and must be elected by popular vote. Of course, the Electoral College is the mechanism we use, but popular vote by the electorate is still the gold standard. That is, we have the right to help choose our Executives. Not so our federal judges.

In like manner, we have the right to help choose our state’s Congress people and our state’s two senators. And while there are no term limits for the Legislative Branch, if we choose, we can vote them out. Not so our federal judges.

The historical reasons for how our ideal form of a Three Equal Branch democracy became two equal branches with the Judicial Branch being outside the control of the citizens are complex and, in many ways, convoluted. For the purposes of this column, I ask for a suspension of your legitimate questions about the etiology of how we got to our current non-democratic system. I respectfully recommend an examination of the most famous and momentous U.S. Supreme Court case, Marbury v. Madison, 5 U.S. (1cranch) 137 (1803). It was the original wrongly decided case that the highly political Chief Justice John Marshall used to outfox his bitter political opponent, President Thomas Jefferson, and usurp out of whole cloth for the Supreme Court the ultimate authority to determine if an act or law was constitutional. That was the beginning of how the federal courts have placed themselves beyond the reach of the citizens and slowly but inexorably created a government that, I submit, James Madison and the other Founders would not recognize. The ideal of a living democracy based on direct citizen involvement in the selection of each of three separate and equal branches of self-government has evolved into bicameral branches of Executives and Legislators who then choose the Judicial Branch.

Most experts now believe it would take an amendment to Article III of our Constitution to return to the purity of the Founders’ vision. If so, that painful and arduous process would be preferable to the alternatives.

Share this:

  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
  • Share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window) WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: America, Democracy, Elections, Executive, Gavel Gamut, Judicial, Legislative, United States Tagged With: amendment of Article III of the U.S. Constitution, Chief Justice John Marshall, electoral college, executive branch, federal judges, Founders, James M. Redwine, Jim Redwine, judicial branch, legislative branch, life-time judicial appointments, Marbury v. Madison, president, Thomas Jefferson, three equal branch democracy, two thirds of a democracy, U.S. Supreme Court

The Briar Patch

July 14, 2022 by Site Admin Leave a Comment

Photo by Peg Redwine

Joel Chandler Harris, AKA Joe Harris (1848-1908), was born in the state of Georgia before the Civil War and worked on a slave-holding plantation as a teenager. After the war he became an associate editor at The Atlanta Constitution newspaper. Harris had lived and worked around the evils of slavery and he had absorbed the folk wisdom of slaves who were prohibited by law from formal education. Harris created his fictional writings using Uncle Remus as a wise and shrewd observer of human nature hidden within animal behavior.

Harris intended his writings as compliments to the ability of Uncle Remus to explain human foibles by giving animals human failings such as arrogance. In the story of Br’er Rabbit and Br’er Fox contained in Harris’ Uncle Remus: His Songs and His Sayings, the meanness of the Fox is used by the Rabbit to escape by getting the Fox to “punish” the Rabbit by throwing him into a briar patch. Of course, that is exactly what the Rabbit really wanted.

Unfortunately, due to our current misguided wokeness in many areas, the slave dialect used by Harris now interferes with the appreciation of the literature of The Song of the South and a great number of those pro-African American folk tales are no longer read. However, for those of us whose time of birth helped us escape the ravages of the current misguided ignorance in the area of children’s literature, Uncle Remus is still imparting wisdom, such as enjoying a proverbial briar patch. Or in my case, Peg’s banishment of me to the solitude of our bunkhouse when I got COVID and Peg did not.

At first, I was offended when Peg handed me my toothbrush and a set of clean underwear and locked our cabin door behind me after she forcefully shut it. It was not that I wanted Peg to share in my experience of a sore throat, lethargy and endless amounts of crud being expelled from my body. It was more the feeling that a one-person leper colony was a rather lonely possibility, plus I really missed my favorite recliner and ready access to the refrigerator. Oh, and Peg too, of course.

Be that as it may, Peg sentenced me to two weeks of quarantine with the same lack of ceremony she would have exhibited if a door-to-door encyclopedia salesman had appeared with a sample case. You remember encyclopedias don’t you, Gentle Reader? You know, those things with pages, tables of contents and indexes that went the way of the dodo bird after Google came along. Well, that may call for a different column.

Anyway, here I am alone with the piles of books I never read, the piano I used to play and old photographs of friends and relatives I barely recognize. I have been rummaging through boxes and drawers filled with the most interesting stuff not seen by me since high school. What a strange looking dude I was with dark colored hair and a discernible jaw line. Who was that and who are those undecipherable young people around him wearing weird clothes?

Say, Peg, what is this thing that says Maytag on it? Is this where my clean clothes came from? It must be a miracle machine. How does it operate? By the way, there is no stove out here and after several days of eating the leftovers you sent with me, I am ready for some real food.

By the way, I have done my Paxlovid and am pretty sure I am not Typhoid Mary anymore. On the other hand, the bunkhouse refrigerator is stocked with leftover beer from our Fourth of July Family Reunion and the TV is constantly tuned to Gunsmoke reruns. The bunkhouse is the answer to every boy’s escape from his mother and every husband’s escape from constant inspection by his wife.

Clothes are in a pile where I take them off. The bed never has to be made to drill sergeant standards and every door knob and chair back is a hanger. But the most serendipitous of all? Peg is afraid to step foot in my little slice of heaven. I may claim to be eternally toxic. Bring on that Briar Patch!

Share this:

  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
  • Share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window) WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Authors, COVID-19, Females/Pick on Peg, Gavel Gamut, JPeg Osage Ranch, Personal Fun, Race, Slavery, War Tagged With: African American folk tales, banishment to the bunkhouse, Br'er Fox, Br'er Rabbit, Civil War, COVID, dodo bird, Gentle Reader, Google, Gunsmoke, James M. Redwine, Jim Redwine, Joel Chandler Harris, Paxlovid, Peg, quarantine, The Briar Patch, The Song of the South, Typhoid Mary, Uncle Remus

© 2026 James M. Redwine

 

Loading Comments...
 

    %d